Pornography and Violence

Online Images and How They Affect our View on Relationships

For this workshop we talked more about real life relationships and how the internet may affect them. What we looked at specifically was porn and how it affects boys and girls differently but also how it would affect a couple in a relationship.

We learnt that online sex is not real, its a bit like WWE wrestling, with real people getting paid to make something look real by acting and over exaggerating.

We also thought about the differences between sex in our parents generation and ours. Sex is much more open now than when our parents were younger. We felt that what we watch does influence our relationships with others and that this was probably one of the reasons that sex could be more open now. For example there wouldn't have been the internet in their times so they couldn't watch videos about sex.

In our discussion we all felt that boys in particular tried to copy what they saw online. It seemed more of a problem for boys as well because when we looked at the statistics about porn, a lot of it is geared towards males but they don't treat women that well and also expect women to do or act in a way they may not in real life. This can cause pressure in relationships as girls may pretend or do things they want because of pressure from the boy. If the girl is honest it may also make the boy feel bad because he expects sex to be what he has seen in porn. For example, one of us told a story of a friend of a girl who when having sex with her boyfriend was asked by him why she wasn't making noises. She told him it was because he wasn't as good as he thought he was.

This story made us realise the importance of communication in a relationship more than porn. Real sex is a mutual relationship, both people are treated equal and trust each other in a sexual relationship. If they can open up to each other and be honest it is easier to know what each other does and doesn't like so that both people can enjoy themselves. This is what makes a consensual relationship.

Overall we all agreed that even though a couple might want to watch for tips, it is not a good idea to to think you can learn everything about sex from watching porn, as being in a relationship is different because it is real life, not acting and not just about sex.